Dear Rednecks

Dear Rednecks Who Find It Completely Appropriate to Let Your Dogs Run Loose in my Neighborhood,

First, let me just say that I love dogs. No, I really  love them. I worked in a vet clinic and at a humane society to help end animal homelessness and cruelty. I have two dogs myself, and I would be devastated if they were hit by a car, or harmed in any way, actually. I try my best to take care of them and give them the love and loyalty they give me without effort each day. I love dogs, but I don’t want them running the streets of my neighborhood every evening like we’re in a village in Eastern Europe.

I know what you’re saying- they’re small dogs- a small schnauzer, some mixed breed, and a puppy Canaan dog, I think. Or maybe, being the rednecks you are, you’re saying “Aah, let ’em run..” Perhaps you’re trying to justify it as your dog “getting out”.  Well, #1)- I know your dogs are small and I’m sure “they’re nice, wouldn’t hurt anyone” etc. I still don’t want your small dog’s crap in my front yard. I don’t let my own dogs crap in my front yard. Why would I want yours? And, guess what? My German Shepherd is a nice dog, too. So why don’t I just let him out to run the streets? That would be rude, disrespectful toward my neighbors and unsafe for my dog, that’s why. I figure if other people like dogs, they’re perfectly capable of having their own. They don’t need mine. #2) Yes, dogs need exercise. Often, people get dogs to have a companion with whom to exercise. I would love to see you and your dog, properly leashed, (not quite sure who I’m talking about here) and walking together in the neighborhood. There’s no better way to bond with your dog than to walk with them. If you can’t find the time to walk your dog and you want to “let ’em run” then you should have bought a double wide on 5 acres instead of a lot in a somewhat busy subdivision. Finally, #3) Don’t even try to act like your dog just “gets out”. I would find it very strange that your little Houdini would also be able to tell time, because I see your dogs out roaming the streets everyday at around 5:30pm, when you get home from work. So I know you are blatantly opening the door and saying.. what? “Take off, Fido!” or “Take off, Bama” (which every dog here seems to be named for their precious football team Alabama, again- Redneck”).

I know I’m going to somehow become the bad guy when I call animal control and have them come out and round up these “stray dogs”. My fellow neighbors and I deserve to be able to walk our own dogs or bike ride with our children without your mongrel running up and chasing either our kids or dogs. When this happens, I will no longer be holding my dogs back, trying to keep them away from your beloved “Bama”. How would you like to be walking down the road and have some person run up to you yelling and then start touching you? That would be crazy, right? Yet this is what your dog is doing when it runs up to my dog, so my dog is not in the wrong for telling yours to be more polite by growling or snapping at “Bama”.

And if this doesn’t stop, don’t think I’ll just go away. When I worked at the Humane Society, I was one of the only people who actually enjoyed obedience training the pit bulls. I said it was because I was the only person who was more stubborn than they were..

And Caleb wants to know, “How big a’ boy are ya’?”


3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Elaine
    Oct 15, 2008 @ 11:29:49

    Oooo, I think Caleb could take “Bama” any day. You trained pit bulls? Really?????? I love dogs, but I’d be scared to death! Of course, maybe that’s because the only time I’ve seen pit bulls up close was when we lived in the city and the drug dealers walked around with theirs . . .


  2. sarah
    Oct 15, 2008 @ 14:43:54

    A (FREAKIN) MEN!!!!!!!!!!!

    Please publish this letter in the Gulf County Star as well! You said it better than I ever could!


  3. Christina
    Oct 15, 2008 @ 22:19:49

    Totally agree. In our last neighborhood (which was way out in the boonies, but still a neighborhood) we had like 5 different dogs that roamed and it made me nuts because if I hit their dog, guess what? Then *I* feel guilty because I love dogs which is completely unfair because I kept my own dogs safely in their fenced yard! Just not right… I say they deserve to have the Humane Society called … if only you could ensure the dogs wouldn’t be the ones punished for their owners’ stupidity.


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